Post by EMS on Apr 12, 2015 16:43:06 GMT -8
original bio here
Darius Faux
To my mother who disappeared and has returned,
You think you may know me, but you don't. I don't want you to know me. I don't want you to know who I really am. It's not worth the pain that it might put you through. I'm not who you think I am. I'm not who I once was. I'm not the small innocent child you raised me to be. You left me when I was a child just to return to my life now that I'm eighteen years old. You've been gone for thirteen years. I've begged for you to come back, but you didn't listen. You ran away like the coward you are. I've adapted to my life without you, and I don't plan on letting you back in. I called your name, but you never responded. Don't try to say you now me because you don't. I am not who I was when you left.
I've grown several feet tall. I was small when you left, but I've grown up to five feet eight inches tall. I weigh one hundred twenty pounds. I weighed fifty pounds when you left! I wasn't ready for everything you put me through. I was five years old! My hair was clean and tame while you were around, but now it's not. I don't care what I look like. I don't care what people say about me. I'll do whatever the hell I want to. My hair is longer than you would ever want it to be. It's shaggy and messy. My dark hair is is lighter from being in the sun so much as I worked myself to death in the orchards. I worked with hopes that you would come back to me. I needed the mother figure in my life, but you were never there.
I cried for you to come back. I spent several nights crying my eyes out wishing you were here. I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. My brown eyes were dry and done. Red covers the whites. My cheeks became red and puffy, but not a single person cared. You were gone before I could do anything for myself leaving me with a person who hates me. He hated listening to me crying. He begged me to stay quiet. "Darius, just get over it. Just grow up into the man she wants you to be." My tiny heart shattered. I wasn't ready. I needed to be with you, but no, you were gone in the blink of an eye. I hate you for leaving me, and you want back in my life, but it ain't happening.
You changed my life. You are the reason I am who I am today. You don't know me so stop pretending you do. My eyes stay full of anger. I never smile. I'll never smile again. I needed you to be here while I went through life. I was lost and hopeless. I needed to run to you, but you weren't there for me. I wasn't ready for you to leave me like you did. I wasn't ready for you to go away. You left me with your stupid brother. He turned out to be just like you! He never wanted to talk to me. He locked me away in a room when I was at his house so I couldn't bother him. I would pound on the old ragged door, but it would never give way. What happened to keeping promises?
"Darius, I promise you I'll come back for you. I just have to go away for a few days." You lied to me. A few days turned into thirteen years! I guess promises aren't meant to be kept. I'll always remember the look of hatred in your eyes when you dropped me off at his house. You didn't want nothing to do with me, and now, I'll return the favor. I don't want nothing to do with you. I don't care if you fell off a cliff and died. It wouldn't matter to me at all. I would laugh. "I will laugh at your death. I will laugh when you are gone away from me forever. I don't need your love anymore. I don't need the mother who was never there for her own son." A child without a mother's love filled with despair and helplessness.
I ran for you, but you never looked back. I yelled for you, but you just kept walking away. "It's for the best." You told me this. I never understood it, but now I do. I finally figured out what you meant. I figured out that I never needed a mother in my life. I just needed myself. I don't need help from anyone. I can get food for myself. I can get what I need. I learnt to fight for myself. I did what I had to do to survive. It was painful when you left, but now it's not. The first few years went by with many beatings from your stupid brother. Many tears were shed, but I never fought back. I wanted to please him in hopes that you would return. I really thought it was for the best, but I that was a lie too.
Innocence has long left me. I'm not going to sit around afraid of everything. I'm not going to sit around while the world rotates around me. I'm going to be the person you wanted me to be. I'll be the son you wanted me to be. I'll show you I never needed you! I never needed a mother in my life! I just needed an uncle to beat some sense into me. "I will be in charge. I don't care what happens to the people around me. I will destroy them. I will destroy them to get to you. You can't hide forever. Run while you can. You can get away from me if you run now. Don't fear me because I'm not afraid of you. I will never be afraid of you, but I will never stop hating you.
Your brother tried to stop me, and I put him in his place. I'll make sure he begs for mercy like he made me do when he was beating sense into me. The only difference is, I won't stop until I get what I want. I won't stop until I get what I want. I enjoy listening to him scream for hours upon hours. I've locked him away in the room he locked me away only I was smarter than him. I tied him up so he can't attempt to escape. I will use him to get to you. I will make you wish you never left me. He's crying now begging me to let him go. He's screaming as I write this, and I am laughing because this is what you wanted me to be. You may want to come and find him before it's too late.
Sincerely,
Your son
Darius Faux
P.S. You may want to come quick because you are running out of time.
Codeword:ThomasNarration A2A283
Thoughts BBAA77
Hearing DDDD99
Speech FFFFDD
Other EEBB66
